I ache. But six hours in the garden today on top of what we've been doing all week and we have an almost clear back garden. Second skip lifted, third skip dropped on the drive. Everything feels manageable for the first time in ages. #MentalHealth is great, physical health isn't bad for a tubby middle-aged nerd, and I'm actually enjoying life. And to top it all off, got my #3 at tte barber's at 8am this morning, first cut since July '20.
Tomorrow I'm going to chisel a coal bunker into pieces. 😁
We've made more impact on working on our fixer upper and it's Jumanji-like garden in the last few weeks than in years. Jo spent most of the day tearing up brambles and weeds and I knocked some stuff down and chucked it in the skip after work. Eldest followed up with a couple of hours of clearing undergrowth.
(a) I'd forgotten how good this sort of thing is for mental health and (b) I can see things taking shape now. Feels good.
I've hit a wall in writing. Every time I try to add punk to Georgian/Regency/Victorian England, even working hard to come up with a hard science alternative timeline to the Industrial Revolution, I end up with something too close to steampunk. And I can't stand steampunk.
So I'm going back to what I know. Hard sci fi, the physics of intra-Solar System space travel, cyberpunk, transhumanity. But trying to keep my ideas on social class disparity in place. Warming up by rewatching Elysium. 😎
My department (Glasgow Computing Science) is hiring a lot of new people at lecture/senior lecturer/reader level (associate prof) and also one full pro:
- Responsible AI (x4)
- Socially Intelligent Technologies
- Machine Learning
- Healthcare Technologies (x3)
- Low Carbon Computing (x3)
- Software Engineering
- Cyber Security (x1 Prof.)
I am leading the Low Carbon and Sustainable Computing theme.
📅 Deadline 26 April.
Listening to Levellers and getting fucking angry at the world. I'm really sorry the generations before mine fucked shit up and I have the most profound respect for the generations that follow mine for doing something about it. In my naivete I honestly thought the new century would usher in a new age of peace, love and understanding. Sorry folks. My bad. ☮️ ❤️
Well, sayonara Night City. 92 hours later I've finished my first playthrough on the XSX. It was gorgeous, beautifully written and an outstanding realisation of a city and characters I've loved for 33 years. It meant a lot to me. It has its bugs and the way in which CDPR management handled its premature launch is horrendous (not to mention other aspects of the company culture, best left to a separate toot), but it was a powerful storytelling experience. I'm looking forward to my next visit. 😎
I guess I don't have a point. My therapist would be happy though, I slipped into an emotional place when that music came on and that's a good thing for a guy that used to spend far too much time as a hyper-vigilant guardian of his pack.
If anything, don't neglect your physical self when you're working on your emotional/mental self. The two are inextricably linked, from what you shove into your mouth to how you hold and move your body. Move your mind and body in unison.
And try yoga.
The weird feeling I get when I listen to this song now is wholly pleasant. It's calming and it takes me inside myself and into a good place. Not at all upsetting (and to be honest, when I was crying my eyes out at it, walking in the dark, I couldn't explain WHY I was crying).
People forget the connection between the mind and the body, whether it's diet (the brain-gut connection) or our experiences. Our nervous systems have memory and unprocessed trauma can sit in there for years. Decades. 2/n
Bit of an odd one. Some piano music just appeared on Deezer and reminded me of something.
When I was seeing a therapist back in 2019, in the first 10 minutes of our first session we talked about trauma and healing. He mentioned that yoga has a really high success rate in assisting with releasing "locked up" trauma. The shit your nervous system keeps hold of like a coiled memory.
I remember walking back from my first yoga lesson, listening to this song and suddenly bursting into tears. 1/n
That was supposed to be "sooooooo" but fuck it, it works. 🐺
Dev. AppSec/InfoSec guy. Writer. Hubs. Dad. Punk of Many Colours. Mental Health First Aider & Advocate. Middle-aged Northern Brit. Sweary. Simplifying life. Lert.
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